I drink good coffee
every morning
comes from a place
that's far away
and when I'm done
I feel like talking
Without you here
there is less to say
Dont want you thinking
I'm unhappy
but it's closer
to the truth
and if i live till I am
a hundred and two
I just don't think I'll ever get over you.
-- Colin Hay "I jsut don't think I'll ever get over you"
The joke lately has been, "wow kati I am so glad you are over her" to which i respond "yeah, i am so over her" and we sorta smiley wryly knowing i am torn up inside and not whatsoever over anyone.
i have cigarettes somewhere around here, i really wanna smoke one.
I am getting bad at this dinner thing, i dont get hungry or thinka bout eating till like 8 or 9 pm and by then the university food court is closed so i have to pay for whatever i eat.
maybe I'll order Jimmy John's
I should worry less about the getting over thing. I am so hung up on getting over her that I spend all my time thinking about the attraction, hence making it worse. I am completely capable of being attracted to other people. I should date someone. hell it seems like forever since i have had a relationship. I miss it. I should go out with someone, not to get over her, but because i like them. thing is most people who are interested in me are the sort i am not interested in. bah. or at least the ones i notice. Mike says so and so likes me, but i think he is full of it. he says alot of things, but whatever. if she did that would be one thing, she is funny and pretty and sweet. but like i said, whatever.
i am too apathetic. i am too inactive. no wonder i am alone.
I miss my sort of hippie spiritualist side. Its still there but i dont think abut it anymore.as mike gets more and more comfortable talking to me about that stuff i miss it. talking about past lives and astral projection is jsut friggin interesting, weather or not i beleive it all.
im hungry
maybe i'll heat up some soup, but i have no crackers
i should do some studying tonight since i am cooped up in the dorm anyway, but my mind is wandering too much