Pretty much every thing in my room that is fabric and not clothing is in the wash right now, blankets sheets pillow cases, my bookbag, even the way too bright orange slip covers i made for the ugly orange dorm room chairs.

There is this feeling that slips over me at the end of the semester as the dorm empties and i am in this huge building almost completely alone. really if i played my cards right i could go about my business without seeing another human being until i get picked up tomorrow. it would be quite easy.

I found two bags of earl grey tea in my bookbag that i completely forgot i snitched from my friend trent's room. they were in that mysterious bookbag pocket that had ended up with a good deal of loose tobacco in it so i am sure that if and when i brew them i will get some nicotine.

one of my friends gave me this pin that was rainbow colored with the word "recruiter" on it, i find it hysterical. It just occured to me that i shall have to make sure it is not on my book bag when i go home . . . it is the beginning of that masking. slowly hiding away all controversial parts of myself.

I wanted to dye my hair red again today so that my parents wouldnt have the joy of the natural brown on my head, but alas i didnt get around to it.

the natural hair color is a totaly fluke accident. i was going for this darker red that looked great on the box but on my head was jsut brown, blah.

I am trying to come up with things to do. i cant pack more because my bookbag is in the wash, i dont really feel like cleaning more. i could play video games. i dont really want to though. I could theoretically even pay my cellphone bill. but no

5 shades darker than this current feeling is the feeling i had at the end of last semester. when i took that long walk around campus after dark. This feeling has a touch of that, the same air about it. a common ingredient