Oh diety, it was fantastic
what was it five minutes? no less than that, when i thought that there was a very good chance that i would die and i didnt care, in fact i laughed. It was the most fun i had in a long time.
I understand the feeling, the want to be in control and out of it all at once. the eyes scare me sometimes, that determination and anger and fear and sadness all at once. I want to know why. i want to know why so much.
because sometimes i think that the only way to understand myself is to comprehend the eyes of those who i am drawn to.
Sometimes aperson can fascinate me, with words with actions but always there issoemthign int heir eyes, that scares many away but i cannot look away from
and that night i didnt want to leave, because i could have at there saying nothing forever and still been entertained, and still been fascinated and pondering over and over
because my heart still pounds when i think about it. I close my eyes and can feel the andrenaline of that moment and i want it to happen agai
i want to laugh and look at the eyes and feel wonderful in silence
and the only thing i said was so little but somehow it meant so much
meant so much to me at least . . . .to anotone else i can only assume
comprehension is so hard sometimes and others it is a moment a moment when i can feel what i couldnt comprehend before and somehow understand through intangible means . . . . understand things that i could never communicate in words . . . .
and this song is all i can think of
<< Fast Car >>
--- Tracy Chapman
You got a fast car
I want a ticket to anywhere
Maybe we make a deal
Maybe together we can get somewhere
Anyplace is better
Starting from zero got nothing to lose
Maybe we'll make something
But me myself I got nothing to prove
You got a fast car
And I got a plan to get us out of here
I been working at the convenience store
Managed to save just a little bit of money
We won't have to drive too far
Just 'cross the border and into the city
You and I can both get jobs
And finally see what it means to be living
You see my old man's got a problem
He live with the bottle that's the way it is
He says his body's too old for working
I say his body's too young to look like his
My mama went off and left him
She wanted more from life than he could give
I said somebody's got to take care of him
So I quit school and that's what I did
You got a fast car
But is it fast enough so we can fly away
We gotta make a decision
We leave tonight or live and die this way
So I remember when we were driving driving in your car
The speed so fast I felt like I was drunk
City lights lay out before us
And your arm felt nice wrapped 'round my shoulder
And I had a feeling that I belonged
And I had feeling I could be someone, be someone, be someone
You got a fast car
And we go cruising to entertain ourselves
You still ain't got a job
And I work in a market as a checkout girl
I know things will get better
You'll find work and I'll get promoted
We'll move out of the shelter
Buy a big house and live in the suburbs
You got a fast car
And I got a job that pays all our bills
You stay out drinking late at the bar
See more of your friends than you do of your kids
I'd always hoped for better
Thought maybe together you and me would find it
I got no plans I ain't going nowhere
So take your fast car and keep on driving
You got a fast car
But is it fast enough so you can fly away
You gotta make a decision
Leave tonight or live and die this way