my body just shakes some times.

I get so nercous when i know i am going to be called on. I sat there in Spanish class and literally shook. I wanted to collapse in on myself. I stuttered out the wrong answer, and i felt like crying

i feel like the world is sneaking in on me. Like everyone is staring, everyone is expecting something and i am the only one who cant meet up to the expectations.

i cried in Spanish class . . diety, I am so ridiculous

I sat there and curled in on myself so tht no one could see and i cried inthe middle of class. over what? i dont know. I cried becausei gotthe nwer wrong because i was afraid, because i wa so stupid,because im scared of everything.

why am i so afraid?

why am i so stupid

im not an idiot, i know that, i know i am actually intelligent but somehow when it comes time to answer a question i calm up get so afraid. the whole world is suddenly against me, everything i against me and i am so small and so insignificant and so unsure.

i blame the tears on strss, i blame it on frutration, on everything but the truth is i have no idea why i cry. I dont know why i am crying now. I cant tell. Why cant i figure out wha ti feel? or why i feel it?

i dont want to be afraid anymore without any good reason. i dont want the world to collapse everytime i am asked a question

i dont want to hold in the tears until i have dropped my friends off so i can bawl while driving the whole way home. I dont want to dry my face in my driveway hoping mm wont notice. I dont want to cry anymore, bot wihtout undersanding it