Im not quite sure what it is that i am expecting of you, or of myself for that matter.

I keep denying myself things that i really and truly want. I dont understand why.
I am looking at everything from one point perspective, all things heading toward that one point.
but what tha tpoint will consist of i am not quite sure.

often in my life i have been unhappy without trying to be happy, and cursed at the sky the whole tiem for it. Right now, i am trying to be happy. I am trying very hard. but all i seem to do is sleep and cry.
Im pulling myself further and further inward, and i cant be sure why.
I'll miss some people here, i will, quite desperately. but i need to get away. I have to.
I am trying to be happy, but somethng is stopping me, i cannot synchronise with the world around me, i cannot find the right tempo.

I wanted to sing a song to you at karaoke tonight, but you wouldn't have been there to hear it.